rebel without a cause

I was coaching with a colleague the other day when we hit upon a core value that we both held sacred: Freedom.

Freedom to choose.

Freedom to express.

Freedom to be.

Our high regard for freedom was, in effect, a rejection of any and all attempts to control us.

Yup.

That's right.

We were both rebels in our own minds.

Never mind our endless quest to do the right thing...the good thing...the honorable thing.

We were rebels at heart with a rebel yell at the ready. 

Heck...

we even had our own revolutionary army of one.

So...

as we continued to work through one particularly sticky issue for me, I suddenly became aware of a tension within my body.

Ding Ding Ding Ding Ding.

That little bit of tension was actually a clue - something to be investigated.

So...

we persevered and dug through the layers of thought until I was finally   able to pinpoint the one thought that was creating this feeling of tension:

"It is just expected of me - I have no choice here."

Well, let me tell you, upon discovering this lovely little thought, my rebel heart near exploded as my army of one prepared for battle.

I was under attack.

Or rather, my value of freedom was under attack.

No wonder I was brimming with tension.

This was a Code RED situation.

Or so I thought.

You see...

my colleague knew better than to just accept this thought as my ultimate truth. And so she kept digging.

And it's in the digging that the magic happens.

This is where the curtain is pulled back to reveal a more powerful truth.

One that truly sets you free.

For me, it was the realization that I actually wanted to do the thing that I thought was only expected of me.

Wow.

Had I taken my original thought at face value, without digging to find a deeper truth, I would have acted against my own desires.

I would have, in effect, acted like a rebel without a cause.

My deeper truth revealed that my freedom had not been taken away by expectation.

My freedom to choose was, in fact, independent of expectation.

The choice was still mine.

Always was.

And I chose to take it.